Who could’ve predicted a pandemic that would’ve turned all our worlds upside down?
After our personal stress and trauma of 2019, Gennaro and I were determine to remain in a space of gratitude for everything that we had. Our son was alive, we had a roof over our heads and we had our health. The loss of Pietro impacted all of our family greatly, every moment of celebration was bitter sweet because we felt his absence. The shock made the grief even more difficult to go through and just saying his name was enough to bring tears to our eyes. The only consolation was when I saw the joy that Francesco brought to those in pain, it made my heart sing. The hard work of sticking to a strict routine had paid off as he was calm, content and confident he was loved.
We decided to have Christmas in the Praiano for the first time in 5 years and fly to the UK after my birthday (the flights were astronomical between Christmas and New Year). We also flew to Ireland so my family (dad’s side) could meet Gennaro and Francesco…It wasn’t easy but it was worth it to see the smile he brought to Uncle Willy’s face and it was great to catch up with my family nearly 10 years on.
When we got back to England Gennaro said he had to go back to Praiano early for some family business… I said that I would follow a week later with Francesco. A couple of days before Gennaro flew out the news of some deadly virus was sweeping through Italy and parts of Europe. We thought that as it was in the North it wouldn’t effect us a great deal and so Gennaro flew back. He reported back that it was a lot more serious than we thought … a few days later Italy went into Lockdown. My flight was cancelled and there wasn’t any other option for me but to sit and wait and book as soon as a flight became available.
Whilst Italy was taking Covid-19 seriously, the UK was being blasé and giving misguiding and confusing messages. The country was divided to keep things open to ensure a good economy or to shut down to stop the virus from spreading. The government decided the former was more important and so people were still going to work, cramming themselves into trains without any face masks, not keeping the advised 2 metres and not self isolating. Instead people decided to stock-pile, resulting in chaos and panic buying so that there was nothing on the shelves for our brave NHS champions and elderly people. Because my father was on a critical list I was doing the food-shopping for my parents… it was a shambles. It took ages for supermarkets to get their operations in order and at the same time the death toll was growing at an alarming rate and numerous of brave doctors and nurses were being recalled from retirement or sabbatical or resignation to help their ex-colleagues who were buckling under the stress. In the meantime I was just looking for a flight to get me back to Gennaro and Praiano. days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. Even though I spent 3 months worrying about my premature son, not knowing when we will all be together again and being without Gennaro was one of the most difficult experiences I’ve been through. I missed his energy. I missed his humour. I missed his laugh. I missed his signing. I missed his thick Italian accent. I missed his cooking. I missed his good morning and good night kiss. I missed being in his arms. I missed watching him playing with Francesco… but most of all I missed his support. I am very independent so I don’t actually rely on others a great deal.. yet sometimes I would get upset that Gennaro didn’t recognise when I needed that bit of extra care… he is so busy all the time and is just used to me managing my own stuff, the signals go straight over his head…I’ve learnt that an earth sign and an air sign isn’t the most tranquil of partnerships but 9 times out of 10 we balance each other out and whilst I was locked up in lockdown I knew, for sure, that just by being around him his energy is enough to brighten up my day.
I then realised that this is what it took to show me that we sometimes took each other for granted. I kind of woke up and was like “Oh OK Universe, I get it, but purleeeese don’t give me anything else to learn today!” I made a vow there and then that I would never travel with Francesco without Gennaro ever again. There were moments of deep sadness – the sentiments of bitter-sweet memories were casting it’s shadow over us again… I was overjoyed to see Francesco overcoming his prematurity and developing and growing so much so quickly but desperately sad Gennaro wasn’t there to witness it himself… he didn’t get to see Francesco’s first birthday, he didn’t get to see him crawl, he didn’t get to see him gnaw on a piece of chicken and countless other things that was a “first”. Finally after 4 and 1/2 months I had got a flight to Rome and we were reunited.
I was surprised at how organised Italy seemed to be than the UK – everyone was wearing face-masks – there was hand sanitiser in every shop…but the mentality and the approach was different. The country seemed united on that protecting its’ citizens was more important than the economy… Everyone was respecting the distance rule, people’s temperature was being taken before entering an indoor space and no one was stashing food and sundries. It was almost tribal…”We versus I”, I always joke that Praiano is like 1954 and sometimes as an opinionated, divorced, foreign woman that’s not such a great time to live in… however it is when you feel part of a community. People pass you on the street, which you a good morning and will ask after your extended family – I now put on 15 minutes to where I want to get somewhere as I need that to stop and have a chat with at least a couple of people on my merry way! And that is why the pandemic here in Praiano may have been hard for us, but it didn’t destroy us.
As a town who is dependent on a lucrative tourist industry we missed those from further a field – namely USA and the UK. As a Brit I can tell you that the majority go on holiday without a budget – we whack everything on the credit card and have a quiet month (or 2!) when we get back to normality. Our culture is focussed on work, money and “stuff” family and community fall a little behind (generally speaking). Perhaps that is why the Brits and the Americans love it so much – they see people living “La Dolce Vita” and the care and concern they have for those around them makes Praiano one of the most friendliest places I’ve ever been to.
Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t all “Dolce fa niente” gelato and prosecco … the winters are tough, the country’s bureaucracy and organisation is a shambles and don’t even get me started on sexism, archaic belief systems, Italian drivers and the price of medicine…BUT when I take everything in consideration the balance is just about there.
I feel so lucky that Gennaro’s unique energy attracts the right people in our lives, we had a hard summer, but some had it harder. We have had to sacrifice certain things and worked twice as much just to brake even, but our reputation has seen us through and we haven’t spent one cent on advertising, staff or other costly overheads.
So I hope that we recover from the pandemic and we find a cure or vaccine soon. Gennaro and I have always seen ourselves as global citizens and we are loyal to the planet, rather than a particular piece of land. We believe we are all connected and that we are cellular beings belogning to a bigger power. We are all in this pandemic together and so the only way through it is by standing strong and unite in the face of struggle.